It is difficult for me to conceive the fact that I have been clean and sober for 13 years. This has been quite the journey. I have seen good and bad days come and go. I have experienced every emotion know to mankind. I have fought urges and temptations and have found myself VICTORIOUS. I have found that I am quite weak in areas and that it is OK for me to admit. I learned that physical strength will only take you so far. I have discovered that I am a far cry from the angry addict that I used to be. I have been recreated into a decent human being. I also like the person I have become.
EVERY DAY IS A GOOD DAY, IT’S JUST THAT SOME ARE BETTER THAN OTHERS.
I recently took a look at a mug shot of mine from 20 years ago. Seven years before my Christian conversion and my miracle. I had, at that point, been an addict for many many years. I was not a decent or good or even a nice person. I was full of anger. My heart was filled with hatred. My head was fogged by a legion of drugs and alcohol. I used people only for what I wanted. I was a master of manipulation. I would lie, cheat or steal without remorse. If I felt that you crossed me or disrespected me there could be dire consequences. I projected fear into many people and always made sure I had the upper hand. I had no respect for authority. My vocabulary consisted of a handful of four letter words. All of my worldly belongings fit into half of a black trash bag. I owed banks money, I owed the IRS several years worth of back taxes, I owed a huge sum of unpaid child support and even my expired drivers license had been suspended and I owed surcharges to boot.
My life was terribly miserable.
I had no mode of transportation other than my feet. I slept where ever I could for free if I could even sleep at all. I was homeless. I was helpless. I was degenerate. I was immoral. I was unlawful. I was actually a pitiful excuse of a human being.
But even in my degenerate state, the God who created the entire universe took the time to look down on me with gentleness and compassion. He overlooked the fact that I was a worm of society and chose me to be His child. When I should have died He offered me a new life. Where I was weak he offered me strength. The sin stained soul that burdened me so heavily He washed clean. He gave me hope. He offered me a fresh start with a clean slate.
I still had to work to pay back all the debt that I had amassed over the years. Even a homeless addict can accrue a large debt. I owed in the neighborhood of $55,000 to various government agencies. I had a HUGE hill to climb.
Even then, God in His infinite wisdom and plans, came through for me. He blessed me with a good job and gave me a strategy to regain my life as a formative part of society.
All of this turn around because God “so loved the world” (John 3:16)
Aren’t you part of the world? This means God loves you. No matter what you have done, God loves you. No matter who you have hurt, He loves you. If you have cussed Him, well, He still loves you. There is no place too far out there that His love can not reach you. No amount of time in the darkness has separated you from the love of God.
NO MATTER WHAT, GOD LOVES YOU!
So Brian, how do I find this God who loves me like that and can He help me change my life?
I will let the Bible answer those questions.
Seek the LORD while you can find him. Call on him now while he is near. Isaiah 55:6
Everyone the Father gives Me will come to Me, and the one who comes to Me I will never drive away. John 6:37
But what does it say? “The word is near you; it is in your mouth and in your heart,” that is, the word of faith we are proclaiming: that if you confess with your mouth, “Jesus is Lord,” and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For with your heart you believe and are justified, and with your mouth you confess and are saved. Romans 10:8-10
for, “Everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved.” Romans 10:13
“Come now, let us reason together,” says the LORD. “Though your sins are like scarlet, they will be as white as snow; though they are as red as crimson, they will become like wool.” Isaiah 1:18
As far as the east is from the west, so far has He removed our transgressions from us. Psalm 103:12
Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away. Behold, the new has come! 2 Corinthians 5:17
It almost seems too simple, right?
But that is exactly how God wants it. Simplified and straight to the point.
If you your hearts desire is for the same fresh start God granted me and for the weight of your sins to be lifted off of you, PLEASE pray this simple prayer with me.
Heavenly Father, I have sinned terribly against You. I know there is nothing I can do to make this right. But I do believe that You sent your only Son to earth, that He lived a perfect sinless life, and that He was crucified on a cross to pay my debt of sin. I believe that he was three days in the grave and that on the third day he resurrected from death and now offers me a new life through this offering. I am the one who deserves death but He paid my price. He bought and purchased me from sin and death with His blood.
Father God, I repent of my sin and I wholeheartedly desire to start over and live my life with and for You. Wash me clean and grant me a fresh start. Fill me with Your Spirit and give me new strength to follow You. Through Jesus Christ name and by His sacrifice I pray, AMEN
Now that your sins are forgiven and your new life has begun, please allow me to be the first to welcome you into the family of God. You are officially adopted into His family as a child of God.
Please reach out to a Bible believing church, Pastor or Chaplain and get your hands on a copy of the Bible. Read it and ask God to reveal Himself to you. I recommend to start with the book of John.
There is more wisdom and answers than I can put into words in the Bible. It is God’s Word and it is TRUTH!
I pray love,, peace and God’s highest blessings over you as you start this new journey.