Through all the years of drinking and doing drugs, I now realize that they were my “crutch” for life and its inevitable problems. Instead of facing life head on, I hid behind a haze of mind and mood altering substances. I always thought that people who didn’t drink or drug like I did were weak. They don’t have the strength to “party” like I do. The biggest problem I had, NOT realizing that I can’t do this alone.
We were not created by God to be alone. From the creation of our beautiful world until Adam and Eve ate of the “forbidden fruit”, (Genesis 3:1-6) God Himself walked with them in the garden. After sin entered into their heart, God was separated from them. What happened next, they became afraid.
When the cool evening breezes were blowing, the man and his wife heard the Lord God walking about in the garden. So they hid from the Lord God among the trees. Then the Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?”He replied, “I heard you walking in the garden, so I hid. I was afraid because I was naked.”“Who told you that you were naked?” the Lord God asked. “Have you eaten from the tree whose fruit I commanded you not to eat?” Genisis 3:8-11
See, that’s where it all started. Can we as humans ever mess something up! A beautiful garden, perfectly created and good in the sight of God. And here come man and his wife to mess up the whole thing! I mean, God Himself spending time with them everyday, just walking and talking with them. Their bestest friend! And knowing they should not eat from the single tree in the garden, they disobeyed and did it anyway. And the first result, Their eyes were opened and they became AFRAID.
What are you afraid of. For me, it was fear of not being accepted by others, fear of telling God I was angry with Him, fear of others finding out who I really am, fear of someone knowing I was abused, fear of others making fun of me, and so on…So, instead of turning to God, who always accepts us wherever and whoever we are, I turned to drugs and alcohol, porn and women, searching for the very thing that God was trying to give me all along. A personal relationship with the One who created me.
So I ask, just as God asked Adam, “Who told you?”
Who told you that you are an alcoholic? Who told you that you were a drug addict? Who told you that you are not acceptable? Who told you that you are not good enough? Who told you that you are not pretty enough? Who told you that you can’t accomplish that? WHO TOLD YOU?
God created each one of us, and God said , “It is good”. God says, “You are good”. Maybe not everything you do is good, but that can all be forgiven. God wants and desires that you come to Him, ask forgiveness for your sins and believe on Christ our Lord, that He died on the cross for your sins so that you can be forgiven. Hebrews 9:22 says that without the shedding of blood there is no remission of sins. But you don’t have to die this death, Christ shed His blood in your place.
If you want to get clean and sober and STAY that way you have to make the decision that you want to. Have a talk with your Creator and tell him you want to. Tell him you can’t do this on your own and that you need His help. Tell God that you know you have wronged Him as well as others and you need to be forgiven. And ask God for His help.
Now that you’ve done that please seek out a church, pastor or Christian counselor that can help you along your newfound road. Sobtiety is a new journey for some of us and we need all the direction we can get!
If you don’t know where to turn please leave me a comment and I will direct you in the right direction!
God bless each and every one of you who share this struggle and my prayer for you is to accept Christ into you heart and your continued sobriety!